Past Masters: Volume 1

by Tanuki Suit

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"Past Masters: Volume 1" is a remixed and remastered version of Tanuki Suit's first two E.P.s. The collection also includes the b-sides "Russian Roulette" and "O! Brooklyn".


released September 1, 2015

Evan - Vox, Guitar /// Tyler - Drums, 1,2,3,4s /// Collin - Key-Bass, Sass /// All Songs by Evan and Tanuki Suit. Logos and Drawings by Melissa. Recorded and Mixed by Tanuki Suit. Tracks 1-5 were originally found on "The Future of the Future" EP released in 2010. Tracks 6-9 were originally found on "The Break-Up Breakdown" EP released in 2011. Track 10 was recorded in 2010 and is previously unreleased. Track 11 was recorded in 2011 and appears on some versions of "The Break-Up Breakdown" EP. All songs remixed by Evan in July-August 2015. All songs re-mastered by Sage Audio in August 2015. Visit us on the web at or contact us at Copyright 2015 tanukisuit4lyf musik.




Tanuki Suit Brooklyn, New York

Tanuki Suit is a 4-piece punk n roll band from Brooklyn, NY.

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Track Name: Syfy Girlfriend
set phasers to stun
don’t wanna hurt no one
she’s the queen amidala to my dr. brown

shields up, get down!
blasters all around
we’re space ninjas, baby!
fighting our way out

i must be out of my mind
because she’s outta this world
and she’s never gonna be
my syfy girlfriend
syfy girlfriend

it’s the future of the future
and we’re running out of time
melmac's been invaded by optimus prime

alderaan’s been sold
to a wookie on the payroll
and they've got tribble trouble, baby
on the enterprise

she’s a sleestak
she’s a cylon
gordon shumway
maybe nien nunb
but she’s never gonna be...
she’s never gonna be
my syfy girlfriend
Track Name: Double or Nothing
I couldn't understand your voicemail
but I think we broke up last night
on Flatbush Avenue, on the way home from the city
I still think that you're pretty
but you're a crazy bitch

It's times like these I play my cards close to my chest
you're much more interested in stacking the deck inside my head
I hear your voice and have no choice but to left you back in bed
My bleeding heart might fall apart, but it hasn't happened yet

And I bet that
I haven't seen the last of you
double or nothing

My breaking heart might fall apart
I just want to know
Track Name: The Girl with the Star Tattoos
girl with the star tattoos, it used to be me and you
and now it’s only me -- how sad.
we used to stay out all night, wake up to the price is right
but now it’s only me in my bed

those tattoos used to make me happy
now they remind me that i’m lonely

girl with the star tattoos, whatever happened to you?
i called you but you never called me back
i used stay up til dawn, wondering what went wrong
but i think that you just found somebody else

those tattoos used to light my flame
but now i think they’re kinda lame
Track Name: Segue
I speak too softly for my own good
I don't keep the promises I should
Let it ride and let me slip away
I've said way too much to just save face
I wish that there were time for second takes
A second chance to make the same mistakes
or let it all just hit the cutting room floor
or act on moments I chose to ignore

If these walls could talk, the stories they could tell
they've seen me cry and play with myself
they've heard the incoherent words I write
they ache and creek to keep me up at night
I replay each day in my head
And each night is the same as the rest
The calendar has changed, I haven't yet
I haven't yet...
Track Name: I Wanna Punch (your lights out)
the first time that i met you
i knew we wouldn’t get along
the next time that i saw you
made me want to write this song

i wanna punch your lights out

girls all think you’re handsome
no matter where you lurk
and i don’t understand it
cuz i think you’re a jerk

i wanna punch your lights out

i wanna punch your lights out
i wanna punch your lights out

you’re a blight on humanity
and i won’t feel sorry
when i finally get to punch your lights out
Track Name: The Break-Up Breakdown
she came in and put her skateboard by the door
and said, “look we have to talk”
she then proceeded to read me the riot act on the ways that I’ve failed her as a boyfriend
and when she was done, i was all like, “yeah, well, whatever.”

girlfriends come and girlfriends go
some you miss and some you loathe
i’ll miss her it’s true
my days are blue now that she’s gone

she blew my mind
she broke my heart
it hurt worse than a hangover
i’ll stay in bed
left for dead
cuz she doesn’t want me anymore
what can i say?
what could i do?
it’s not the same without her around
it could be worse
just another verse
in the break-up breakdown

so the other day i see her
and she’s with this dude with an unfounded sense of entitlement and a williamsburg haircut
and i’m all, “are you kidding me?”
Track Name: Hasselhoffin'
Took my board out to the Rockaways
I love the beach on a lazy Saturday
I was catchin' waves, she was catchin' sun

The undertow pulled me out to sea
from the surf I caught her making eyes with me
I think I pitched a tent in my trunks

My friends say she's too young and that I could go to jail
but her out of state ID says she's 24

Run and gun
under the sun
she seems fun
and I think she kinda likes me

Queen of the Beach
Cock of the walk
Makin' my move
like a modern day Hasselhoff

And as the sun set on the Rockaways
We strolled the boardwalk and she took my hand
I was thinkin' she might be the one
and like the Hoff, I tried to play it cool
Asked her out, Friday night after school
But then her mom came and picked her up
Track Name: She Blew Me a Kiss
we went out on a date
and we had a nice time
i gave her a hug and she blew me
a kiss

i picked her up in my mother’s car
i was shifting gears, i put my arm around her
and she blew me
a kiss

when all the other girls
wouldn’t even look my way
she hung around just to say
that she’d blow me
a kiss

Soon all the other girls
(won’t look at me quite the same)
will stop running away
when they all hear you say that you blew me
a kiss
Track Name: Puerto Rican Moon
you’re my little puerto rican moon
and everyone is watching you
to see what your gonna do
with that little puerto rican moon

you bend and you break, let your body shake
turn and you twist, scaring all the kids around you
around you...

god damn
i am, impressed!

lemme see you dance
in those fashionable pants
dangerous as a mongoose
a pale puerto rican moon
Track Name: Russian Roulette
darkness has settled
they tested their mettle
and went toe to toe for days
neither will budge or pull their next punch
stay out of the other one's way

I could tell we were a wreck
weekends like russian roulette
nowhere to go but down
not gonna make it out of here

the empty sensation
of new liberation
that chance that we just blew to hell
the ending was fitting
and real f***ing s***y
but I want nothing more than to wish you well
Track Name: O! Brooklyn (a love story of annexation)
Brooklyn, Brooklyn borough by the ocean
Brooklyn, Brooklyn a county built for Kings
Brooklyn, Brooklyn a monument for excellence
Brooklyn, Brooklyn is so much better than Queens

Settled in 1634 by some Europeans called the Dutch
Wooden shoes, the first fashion statement in Williamsburg
Immediately gentrified, the Mohawk tribes were bought out
their sacred hunting grounds became vintage clothing stores.

Brooklyn, Brooklyn borough by the ocean
Brooklyn, Brooklyn a county built for Kings
Brooklyn, Brooklyn a monument for excellence
Brooklyn, Brooklyn is so much better than Queens

In 1664, the British took control with promises of
organic tea and prix fixe brunches
A revolution broke out, when the brunches ended at noon
United we stand for mimosas

Brooklyn, Brooklyn borough by the ocean
Brooklyn, Brooklyn a county built for Kings
Brooklyn, Brooklyn a monument for excellence
Brooklyn, Brooklyn is so much better than Queens

in 1883, the Brooklyn Bridge gave passage
for Zagat to rate Grimaldli’s pizza
By 1898, Manhattanites had had enough
and with Jay-Z’s okay annexed the city

Brooklyn, Brooklyn a once proud sovereign city
Brooklyn, Brooklyn we still have cheaper broker fees
Brooklyn, Brooklyn we might be Manhattan’s little bitch
Brooklyn, Brooklyn but we’re so much better than Queens